Innocent Abroad

Years ago, while I was still in college, my uncle and I were having a discussion about our different views when it comes to American politics.  I was still new to the idea of domestic issues, having only lived in the US for less than two years at that point, and was in the midst of expressing my disapproval of how the Bush administration handled international affairs (if I remember correctly, this was even pre-9/11).  He responded by telling me, "When you start to pay taxes, you will understand."  Well, I pay taxes now, and my opinion hasn't changed much.

I received my stimulus check today, and found myself intrigued by just how little my opinion really has changed.  I realized, I am profiting greatly of off Bush's failures, and yet I still highly dislike the man's policies.  I'm not rich by any means, but just about everything I have is because the current administration has botched things so superbly.  Because I was a student for all of 2007, I paid very little in taxes to the federal government, and yet I still received a stimulus check.  In fact, my stimulus check amounted to more than I had paid, and so I actually made money on my taxes this year.  So, while the government is racking up trillions of dollars in debt, I just got paid to not work all year, while I spent most of last year in a country we don't even have full diplomatic relations with.  Fascinating.

Before anyone points out that this was a bit of a glitch that highlights some of the problems with the quick-fix mindset of the stimulus checks, let me point out this is in no way the only way I have benefited from his short-sighted policies.  After all, it was this administration's grand failures in the Middle East that led us to realize we need more Arabic speakers, leading to new funding and language programs.  In college, I could barely find an Arabic program and certainly didn't have funding, but now I've had the past fours years of full time education paid for - three of those years paid for in full purely because I was taking Arabic as at least a part of my studies.  I'm realizing that job opportunities have likewise expanded over the past few years.  Now, I still consider myself to be an Africanist at heart, but even there I seem to be benefiting.  Bush's failures in the Middle East has also made this administration want to highlight progress in Africa, making it a vastly more appealing arena in which to work.  Analogies to our bumblings in Iraq and concern over the "rise of China" have made Sudan into real news, challenging the American view of ourselves as sole superpower and global policeman.  All of a sudden, it seemed that I went from caring about a place no one else had heard of to being an "expert" actively recruited into priority jobs.  A president who handled things better, capitalized on the goodwill towards America immediately following the 9/11 attacks and didn't tank our economy might not have led to the creation of as many jobs and fellowships for people with my interests and skill sets.  And yet, I still agree with the commentators who say he just might be the worst president we in the United States have ever had.

Meanwhile, I've been doing some reading on the history of US involvement in the Middle East.  I was happy to find evidence supporting my often-stated assertion that, contrary to popular belief, the US has never really lacked skilled and experienced people when it comes to the Middle East, but rather has lacked the domestic will to listen to the advice and conclusions of those people.  This does not bode particularly well for any of my future career options.  All the new fellowships, intensive language programs and job openings will mean nothing if the work of the people who fill those positions does not make it's way into policy change.  So far, there seems little reason to believe that it will lead to such a change, leading to the conclusion that all of these new things are really an extension of the old - domestically, they sound great and imply we are making real strides forward, but they have little impact in the places they claim to be designed to improve.  I hope this is not true, since it would make my work pretty meaningless, but so far I must admit that it certainly seems to be the case.

So, in case you haven't already figured it out, I've decided to expand this a bit beyond just a blog about my time in Syria.  I've been back in the United States now for over two months, my former classmates have also finished out their time, and the next group of students has already left and started class.  It seemed very dishonest to pretend that I still have that much to say about Syria or Syrian/American relations, despite requests to maintain my blog. It's time to turn the page on that period of my life. However, I do occasionally have things to share, or rant, so I'll continue to put my thoughts up here from time to time, and I definitely hope that you continue to send your comments and feedback.

(Compiled by my classmates - this is the edited version, sorry, I tried to pick the less-harsh/more-universal ones)

You think traffic cops are worthless

Even though a ton of Syrians got paid to hang out with you, you still couldn't make any friends

If you hear إن هذه مكالمتك الاولى هذا اليوم one more time on your cell phone you're gonna slap somebody

You need new passport pages

The theme songs of the year were: Acon's "Smack dat," George Michael's "Careless Whisper"  and, of course, anything Fairuz

You've seen more of Syria than 95% of Syrians

The muhajabat (veiled women) wore tighter clothes and more make-up than you did

You've begun to attribute all physical ailments, no matter how unrelated to one another, to a mysterious phenomenon called "greeb"

50 percent of your daily activities are governed by whether or not you have appropriate change in syrian lira

You will tell bald-faced lies to store owners and even friends, claiming that all you have is a 1000 lira note, in order to hang on to your small bills

You speak English with "dangling modifiers" i.e. "The town which I traveled to it"

You've sweat in places no one thought possible

You feel like a slut wearing a short sleeve shirt

You've smoked more (second-hand) than the Marlboro Man

You make grammar mistakes in English

Syrians talk about your cheap phone

You are able to switch seamlessly between English and Arabic depending on who is coming in the classroom door

Fake eyebrows and leopard print start to look like normal fashion statements

You look over your shoulder before logging onto Facebook

You have time to cook dinner and watch a boot-leg dvd in the time it takes to load one web-page

Personal dress now includes pointy shoes (including for men)

There is no such thing as a line or "I got here first"

The cooler you are, the more gel in your hair

You've never been to the movie theater

Depending on the day, Syrians will either tell you that you speak better Arabic than they do or that you should really consider taking beginning classes

Everything was first invented/discovered in Syria, including the pyramids and Japanese

You have vehemently argued with taxi drivers and fruit vendors over 25 cents

You consider the secret police great for giving directions, rides, or helping with luggage

I really shouldn't find this so amusing, but apparently they have passed new traffic rules in Syria, which are going into effect this week.  For those of you who have seen traffic anywhere in that part of the world, much less in Syria, should be able to appreciate why I find this so amusing.  I'll be curious to see how enforcement goes.

Traffic Fines include:

Fines ranging from 500 to 10,000 Syrian lira (SYP) will be imposed for infractions such as:
* Children riding in the front seat or in the driver's lap
* Tossing rubbish from vehicles while driving
* Playing loud music while driving through neighborhoods at night
* Failing to use directional signals when turning
* Reckless speed and changing of lanes
* Transporting items exceeding the body of the vehicle in a dangerous manner
* Using cellular phones (mobile phones) while driving
* Having a license plate with illegible numbers
* Allowing unlicensed drivers to drive the vehicle
* Passing other vehicles on corners, uphill slopes, tunnel, bridges and crossroads
* Driving without a valid insurance contract
* Not using safety belts in the front seat
* Not keeping a first aid (medical) kit in the vehicle
* Not keeping a fire extinguisher in the vehicle
* Driving with an expired license

Pedestrians may be fined 200 SYP for "jay-walking" -- crossing the street not in the designated location or against the light.

The full text in Arabic can be found at:
http://www.mot.gov.sy/index.php?d=177&id=597

It's an interesting thing, a number of people have asked me about "word on the street" or "public opinion" in Syria since getting back to the US - but then few, if any, seem to believe my answer.  If this helps any, here's some results from a recent opinion poll.

I've been tossing a culture shock post around in my head for a couple weeks, but it's not quite ready, sorry.  In the meantime, I did put a bunch of pictures from my final days up.  Click the Flickr link to see them all.

Baby Camel

Valley of the Tombs

I had intended to end this blog upon my return to the United States.  However, I've received enough requests to keep it going that for now I will continue to update you on my resettlement process.  So, reverse culture shock moment number one (ok, so maybe it's not really the first, but it was the first that really felt like it):

I've been planning to visit a couple friends of mine in New York and Connecticut.  We had briefly discussed this plan, and so apparently in my mind it was settled.  Not so much for them.  Last night I got more than one call from semi-concerned sounding friends that I had not fully informed them of my plans.  My travel system for the last ten months, however, has been to head to the bus station and hop on the next bus in my direction, and send a message to whoever might be waiting at the other end if anyone was.  I once agreed to meet a friend at the bus station, and arrived not entirely sure if we were heading to Lebanon or Jordan.  So because of the fact that I had informed my friends here on the East Coast of the time of day of my arrival, I thought I had done quite well.  Shortly after receiving two phone calls, I was reminded how irritated I used to be by such "lack of planning".  I have come to learn, it's not really lack of planning, it's just different planning - and being more flexible because of numerous possible unforeseen delays.  But in America we like schedules and planning in advance.  I'll try to remember that again.

Oh, and I was highly amused when I stepped on the New York subway only to find myself, yet again, the only blond in sight and being stared at by just about everyone.  I'm told it's different reasons here, but it's a nice reminder that it's not only a "foreign" or "Arab" thing.

"I'm coming home, to the place where I belong..." played over the in-flight entertainment system as I looked out my window with the lights of DC spread out below me.  The next morning I attended Easter services with my family, and it felt like I hadn't been gone a day.

I've been back in DC a while now, and I'm definitely still processing the past year.  Home has always been a bit of an interesting concept for me.  Am I "glad to be home", has been the common question.  Well, yes.  But I miss Damascus, too.  I strongly believe that when you live in a place long enough, it becomes a part of you.  Especially if you have to carve out a life there yourself.  I had learned to cross six-lane highways without slowing my pace, board buses while they were still moving, dress so they didn't make me wear a tourist robe at the mosque, give directions so I actually got places efficiently, and cook for one without temperature dials or a microwave.  I knew just the right place for fresh juice, fresh milk, the cheapest internet, the best view, the best deserts, the cheapest vegetables, my favorite jewelry, or just about anything else I could need.  A few things would forever mark me as a foreigner - I refused to wear "a kilo of make-up", had only a minimum of sparkles on my jeans, and could occasionally be caught reading on the bus - but I was starting to blend in at times, or at least not be the main attraction all the time. I had made a life for myself.  I still don't think I would ever choose Damascus as my favorite place to live, but I had learned to be happy there.

Of course, that meant it was time for me to leave.  I had a number of reasons for leaving when I did, and a few things holding me back.  In the end, however, it was clear that it was time.

Just a brief message for those of you still reading this and wondering what happened to me.  My cousin has been here, so we have been hitting all the highlights of Damascus.  We have been maxing out our bank accounts, running ourselves ragged, and stuffing ourselves until we hurt, and so generally having a wonderful time.  Today we saw Krak des Chevaliers, which was a bit hazy, but the spring flowers everywhere were a nice touch.  Tomorrow, back to Palmyra, only this time with several members of a Syrian family, extended family, and no less than two Arab mothers in tow.  Could be interesting.  I'm going to see if I can sneak some sleep in beforehand.

It seems that just about every (English-speaking) writer commenting on Damascus these days feels compelled to make some forced allusion to "the road to Damascus", and I will admit that I am rather ashamed to now join their ranks.  However, the other day I actually visited Paul's road to Damascus, so for once it seems appropriate.

I thought I had done quite a good job of exploring Damascus, and all my friends (and even a few Syrians) say I now know my way around and have visited more sites than anyone else.  As I was looking through some books on Paul, however, I came across bright photographs of a large church with impressive stained-glass windows and an attached monastery complex.  How could I have missed something to expansive?  I'd never even heard of it, and couldn't imagine where it might possibly be.  The captions said it was built to commemorate Paul's meeting on the road to Damascus, and so it seemed possible to me that it was in the countryside down near the Jordanian border - an area I have spent little time (although I thought something so significant still should have been in a guidebook).  So I asked the shopkeeper, and he looked at me quite surprised that I had no idea.  He said it was only a few minutes walk from where we presently were, and proceeded to draw me directions.  Following them, I very soon found myself in a neighborhood just outside the Old City where I never would have thought to explore on my own.  It was the middle of the day so I felt completely safe, but I think it was easily the worst neighborhood of Damascus that I have walked through on my own.

After a couple minutes, however, I found not just one but a whole number of large and impressive churches, all built beside each other.  I also wandered into a large Christian cemetery, with white marble graves and large statues of angels and saints.  I wandered in and out of several church compounds, until finally I spotted the tall, A-shaped church I had seen in the photo.  Unlike the others, this one also had an office with a woman working in it, who kindly let me in to the main sanctuary.  It appears to be a quite modern church, I would guess it was probably built in the 1960's, and is attached to a Franciscan monastery.   It also has rooms where visitors can stay, and I realized  I had (probably) finally found the place my family and I had stayed when we visited Damascus at Easter when I was about two years old.  I was kicking myself for not having brought my camera, but I had started the day without any plans for an exploratory expedition.

As for the site itself, I was a bit amused.  Although the church claims to mark the site where Paul (Saul at the time) encountered Jesus on the road to Damascus, it stands only about 200 meters from the western gate of the Old City.  This seemed awfully close to the city to me - why did the story say he met him "on the road" and not "by the gate"?  According to the book, since they lead Paul "by the hand" back into the city, they said it couldn't have been any further away since if I had been, they would have sent horses.  But he'd just fallen off his horse and now he was blind, so they would have stuck him back on a horse if it was more than a five minute walk?  The lady also said there was a cave  - there's always a cave - out back where Paul had stayed for three days.  Again, I was confused.  If Paul could walk from there to Ananias in the Old City in ten minutes (ok, maybe twenty since now he was blind and needed help), why did he stick around in a cave for three days first?  Doesn't matter, this is the cave where he stayed.  Fine.  If there's one thing I've learned about holy sites in this part of the world, it's that although people like to make a big deal about places and build churches on "the exact spot", that truth of that claim (or the sense behind it) matters very little.  What matters is the memory of what happened, and I do love to hear the stories.